At the Kiloby Center, we have been treating addiction in a radically new way. Using Scott Kiloby’s groundbreaking methods, we have woven together the ancient practice of self inquiry with modern, evidence-based mindfulness tools to help clients get to the ROOT of the suffering that drives addiction.
If you have been following Scott, you have seen that these methods can open the door to a new kind of freedom not just for those suffering from addiction, but for ALL OF US. At the core, this work is about freedom from suffering. So this work is for everyone.
But how can you know if immersive inquiry is right for you? Here are 10 signs and symptoms that you are done suffering… and ready to begin healing it at the root through self inquiry:
You constantly feel guilty. Thoughts and fears that you are under threat or under attack keep coming up again and again, no matter how irrational you tell ourself these thoughts are. You find it hard to truly trust- yourself or others.
2. You can’t get out of a relationship or situation and you feel stuck.
You feel resigned to settle for anything at all. Maybe you’ve cognitively resigned to the idea that you will always struggle, but the suffering you experience around that belief refuses to diminish. No matter how much you try to accept it, you just believe it is true. And it HURTS.
3. You can’t stop engaging in a behaviour.
Whether it’s judging yourself or others, scaring or hating yourself, pretending or posturing, or using substances or processes to soothe/cope etc, there is some behaviour you just feel STUCK in. You keep going back to it again and again… and feeling more and more guilty for doing so.
4. You have a hard time experiencing the present moment due to feeling caught in the imagined past and/or future.
You find yourself “time-traveling” in your mind, either re-living past painful experiences or projecting a disastrous future and are unable to to rest in the quiet simplicity of the present moment.
5. You obsess over a situation or person.
You can’t stop thinking (positively or negatively) about a specific past or future situation or a certain person to the exclusion of all else.
6. You doubt and question yourself.
You don’t or can’t trust your own perceptions and question yourself mercilessly to the point of feeling like you don’t know what’s what anymore. Anchorless.
7. You are identified with some philosophy/ideology/belief system to the point where you react or get defensive if someone questions or challenges it.
You feel a compulsion to submit to these people or institutions… even if deep down you don’t really like or believe in them. You WANT them to be true while simultaneously not fully believing or buying into them.
8. You feel like a fraud.
Listing your accomplishments does nothing. At the end of the day, you find it hard to shake the core belief that you are an imposter. On some level you just keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, and reveal to everyone who you really are. This leads to self-sabotage. The fear that you aren’t really good enough drives you to question yourself and your decisions in such a way that you miss opportunities, shy away from challenges, and disengage from activities and endeavors that you once found fulfilling and rewarding.
9. You can’t express yourself fully or at all.
You find yourself compelled to repress expression of any kind- whether it is fear, anger, or even love. It gets harder and harder to allow these emotions, and you feel more shame for feeling them in the first place. There is an underlying belief that who you are is in some way is fundamentally flawed.
10. You feel shame.
You feel as if you are inherently wrong or bad – like your whole being is a mistake and that everyone knows this no matter how much you try to hide it from them.
If this pulls you, call us now at 1-866-KILOBY-5 to learn about how we can support you.